Life Spoken Inspired: January 2006

Friday, January 27, 2006 

Paul


        Ok guys, well I’ve been well overdue for a post for a while now. I guess it was a bit hard for me personally to take the time to relax and dwell upon His word and become inspired for something to share. Hopefully this post can make up for any ground I’ve lost with this blog and the inspirations in me can help inspire you guys as well =) take care and enjoy. God bless.

        So yeah, I’ve been working my butt off in school, so much work that I’ve been spending my life in class, studying or sleeping… barely even time to eat (although I make time). This whole past week I’ve been working on all my subjects, except for my religious studies course. For this course, I have no midterms, no exams, just three papers due over periodic times. My first one is due on Tuesday and I tried to finish everything such that I could have a lot of time to work on this assignment. For the assignment I had to write about Paul and his life as told by the Acts of the Apostles. As you can imagine, that means going through the book of Acts and reading each verse carefully to extract any information relevant to Paul. The actual note taking process took me around 7 hours last night, and writing the report today took me another 4 or so hours. I still have editing to do, just… not now. Haha. Well yeah, basically through writing this assignment I reached a point where I was so inspired. Really, if you have time and the will power... read acts... it’s an awesome read. Learn about Paul... either that or ask me to send you to my assignment (8 pages double spaced) and read it. The life of Paul is really amazing, I never realized. It fully shadows the life of Jesus, the preaching, the miracles and all. (Paul even revives a guy too, funny story, how many of you guys actually knew that?) But I won’t ruin any more for you.

        I’m here today because I was so inspired by Paul’s story. This guy shows boundless faith and perseverance. He was beaten to the brinks of death, like what, 5 or more times? And the best part of it, he either got back up on the spot or the next day and just started preaching again. What a guy. How many of us get beat down by our daily lives and we’re down there for days, for weeks, for months or ever years… There’s so much more too. Paul was thrown in jail, down to the dirts and stuck behind bars. What does he decide to do? Him and his pal Silas begin to pray and sing praises unto God. Like WHHHAATTT?? In jail? Like… how many of us even think of singing praises when we’re in school let alone jail. This God must be some amazing dude for this Paul fella.

        I was having a conversation with my friend Bryan. I guess, safe to say somewhat discouraged about not hearing about many miracles here in North America? Correct me if I’m wrong. We were discussing how the amazing things we here about happen in the more underdeveloped countries (I didn’t agree with this, but just making a point). He finds it hard to compare to the miracles of Christ and even Paul. Paul, who like Jesus, revived a dead man, healed the masses, preached with scripture and led those who were lost. I guess my point is, how did Paul get to this point of shadowing Jesus move for move?

        Many of us have heard the story of Saul on the road to Damascus. I often use it as an analogy to our lives (will tell it again later). One of the things I found most surprising is that Saul’s transformation doesn’t really happen there when he’s struck blind. (I think it is a big misconception that Saul transforms into Paul there and becomes an amazing instrument for God). Saul, although he does change at that moment, has barely begun his transformation. Saul is struck blind early in Ch. 19. From there he is guided to the town and then Ananias returns his sight to him. From there he begins his preaching and sermons in the synagogues, and right away is persecuted.

        Right now, Saul is still known as… Saul. He’s preaching and getting beat up and all that. Many people (including myself) believed at this point that Saul has transformed, that he was made new. But no… he isn’t. It is not till chapter 13 that Saul completes his transformation. A whole four chapters pass until it really happens. In chapter 13:9 Saul performs his first miracle and strikes an evil sorcerer blind, and is from now on, called Paul.

        Paul’s miracle was a sign of the completed transformation because that is when he was then on referred to as Paul. Now, why you ask when he performed a miracle? Well the analogy I tell my friends is that, “God is not going to strike you blind on the road to Damascus.” Meaning, stop waiting for God to do something ‘amazing’ to you. No, I’m not doubting God’s power. If it is in His will, then yes he will strike you blind and kick you in the butt, but you shouldn’t be sitting idle till then. Yes, Paul was struck blind; the power of God was so evident in his life, thus he was justified to preach with fervor and persistence. But then again, no, these were all acts of faith on Paul’s part. Paul was not considered transformed until his faith was at a level that he performed a miracle. At that moment is when God was so pleased with him that he gave him a new name. What I’m trying to say here is not to go trying to strike your enemies blind, but that you need to have acts of faith. God wants to see you do something for him, out of faith, without him needing you to be struck blind. At that point is when God will really fill you up with the Holy Spirit and use you as part of his perfect and pleasing will.

        How many times do I have to say? Failure is not doing something wrong. Failure is missing the opportunity to do something amazing. God wants you to have faith. He wants you to do something amazing for the cause. Be like Paul. Have faith, take initiative, persevere and you can see what God can do with you. Paul was God’s
“Chosen Instrument” (Acts 9:15). What name does God have for you? No matter who you are, where you are, and what you’ve done, I’m so sure that God did not create you to live your lives day in and day out doing absolutely nothing.

        I hope you don’t see it that I put any of your levels of faith into question; I would hate to do that. But, yes, you can argue, you don’t need to do works to believe in God, or to get into heaven. But I argue on pretense of James 2:14-26; if you have faith, where are your works? I’m sorry to say, maybe you think you have faith, but maybe your works say otherwise.

        I write this for encouragement. God can do so much with one man. The planet was changed from the actions of Jesus Christ, Paul, Silas, Luke, the Apostles, all just men. Men with sandals on their feet and not a clue in the world how much their lives would change the world (excluding the first dude). Today I call upon you to be a man or woman with nothing but a passion in their hearts to do something amazing for God. No longer can we sit and watch the others like Paul do all the dirty work. Paul was a hero of the faith. What have you contributed to the faith?

4:33 PM | |

Monday, January 16, 2006 

excuses...


        Kay good… no one reads this anymore so I can finally talk without censorship. Not censorship that I swear… because I don’t really tend to swear much at all… But basically, having to dim things down, or watch what I say because it’s offensive to some people... I feel I haven’t “unleashed the fury” as some would call it, for a while now. I don’t think I’m in the mood right now to write a full fledge angry at society post, but I’ll blurt out a few things just to make me feel better.

        I’m tired of excuses… how many people say that already, but really, sometimes excuses get on my nerve. Fine, a valid ‘pardon’ from something is fair, but excuses… like… c’mon. Sometimes it can get hard to part from these harsh realities, but people who turn something down because their heart was never fully into it from the start, or even just prior to the situation, your excuses are worth nothing. Fine, something that happened helped you make a decision that you were going to end up doing eventually. I hate it when people expect things to go perfectly well and when it doesn’t they jump off the car and complain about their scrapes n bruises.

        This isn’t geared towards anyone specifically… it’s a cumulation of things that have been going on, much so with my old youth group back home. Although I feel extremely distant and severed off, they’re family. Hearing so much of the pains going on back home really pains me. Seeing the brothers and sisters whom I was raised with just quitting the race, just sucks. Yeh, it hurts and I’ll admit it, but I gotta keep running my race, if anything with more incentive. I have a whole mission field here waiting, and it’s time to learn from others mistakes and do something for God today.

        I really just don’t understand sometimes, I’ve been through the same situations, maybe not exactly the same, but I’ve felt many of the pains the world can throw at me. Although I say this and it just leaves a WIDE open door for God to test my faith, then bring it. If that’s how much it’ll really take to humble me down to the level of those whom I see. I’m not trying to be cocky or anything, I just can’t stand it when others try and “walk” the race. Too many times do you people just give up when you see those who are actually running, race over the horizon. Stop seeing this whole thing as a battle or competition. I don’t claim to be doing well, because I know how great others are doing. But, enough is enough. I talked about apostles and disciples. Being an apostle doesn’t distinguish the runners and the walkers. It just separates the leaders and followers. But you gotta be in the race.

        I really just pray that God can help these people out. I’ve tried and prayed so much for them. The countless suggestions from experience and offers to help. If you’re hurting, seek help from someone. If you’re lost, stop and ask for directions. If you’re unable to walk, get someone to carry you along. No no no no no more excuses. Run the race. Run it with Perseverance. Finish strong. No giving up, no giving it. This is the cry of the persevered heart. No more letdowns.

1:59 AM | |

Tuesday, January 10, 2006 

make me...


        Lord, it seems as if I have reached a dead end in my life now. I don’t know where to go. It’s not that it’s a dead-end… it’s more like I lead myself into a four sided confinement. I remember a long long time ago, when I was very much so a baby Christian, I remember just praying for someone, a sort of prophetic prayer for them, and reminding them: When we feel trapped, and the walls are closing in around us, we always have a way out. And that’s upwards. God is there to help us out. But I still feel trapped.

        Lord, I trust you. I guess it feels like a humungo maze. I’m lost and it feels like I’ve been running this maze for so long now. But I know you’re up there. And I trust you. Not because I know you see me on a different level. Not that you’re up there and you can see my path out. I trust you because you’ve lead me out of situations like this before. I trust you because I know it’s in your character to be there for me. Because I know you love me and I’ll embrace that. But I still feel lost.

        Lord, I want to be all I can for you. Over dinner I was talking about life in general, and mentioned how short life is. We’re here, we die and we’re gone. In this short time I have, I want to do something great… I’m not willing to take the risk of doing something that I’ll look on in shame for the rest of eternity. I want to regret nothing, give it my all, run the race with deep perseverance and never give in. I want to be more than everyone thought me out to be. But I always cut you short.

        Lord, I want to leave a legacy. When I die, I want people to see, to see how great you are. How great you were in my life. No, I couldn’t care less for the title, I’ll be dead anyways. But I want to leave something for people to benchmark. Maybe I’ll be their role model, their mentor, or guide. Hopefully people will use what I left, and surpass it. I want to leave something behind that was worth the pains and struggles of today. But I find it hard to even see myself as a good Christian sometimes.

        Lord… It’s not you… definitely not, it wouldn’t be. It’s me, I cut you short, I underestimate your ability, and I ignore your advice for my life. Lord, make me an apostle. I want to show you, I can overcome the dead ends, I can find me way through the maze, I can run the race of perseverance and I most definitely will leave a legacy of you behind when I’m gone. I proclaim it now, none of this is for me, this is for You. I owe you too much to let up now. Lord, all I have is from you. Make me so that all I have to offer to others is you.

Lord, make me more.

2:18 AM | |

Monday, January 09, 2006 

institutionalized


        Well, finally back. Please excuse me for anything that doesn’t make sense… I haven’t written for a while and it’s pretty early right now. I’ve been back in classes for a week now, (those of you starting today, feel blessed) but I guess I’ve been doing some thinking and I feel utterly “trapped” in ways. I’m back in my educational institution of choice, here to bring my GPA back up such that I don’t get kicked out of my program. Sometimes the hardest part of doing all this is really not knowing where I’m headed in the future. To have goals not exactly in line with what I’m doing now really has its toll on my original goals. I’ve really adopted a set of new goals (hopefully temporarily) just because I need to change my focuses right now to stay institutionalized.

        I’m no expert on the topic of institutions… or on many things for that matter, but I just find it interesting… or rather weird how society developed so much in such a short period. It was only during my grandpa’s time when everyone had a “trade” profession, taught by a parent or by a mentor of sorts. What happened to those days? I wouldn’t say it’s the cause but through things like school, where the ‘elite’ of society only survive, we’re creating larger and larger gaps between the poor and the rich. Even for myself I find myself gaining an awful sense of pride over some other people, who may not be in as prestigious a program, or university.

        I’m not quite too sure where I’m going with this all, but I guess the reason I feel somewhat trapped is that I always saw myself as some sort of ‘free spirit’. I feel as if my life is getting taken away by school. Yes, of course I love it here, the people I meet and the times I have, and I’m not even too sure where I’d be if not for school. In general I hate the whole institutionalized society. I hate it because I know that it is killing me to live in four month sections, living and working to attain some numbers that are supposed to tell me who I am. Am I worthy to graduate? Do I have what it takes to live in the business world? Am I more than ‘the rest of society’? All these questions… and they supposedly have simple answers: numbers. Two digits numbers that tell me who I am. It just hurts to live for that. If I had a choice, of course I’d go for something else, but I’m here. This is society today, and it’d all be in vain to try and bring back the old times. Times of a simpler life, without all the hate, all the crime, all the killing, all the attitude. Oh, how sweet it would be to get away from all this attitude people have adopted these days.

        I REALLY don’t know where I’m going with this whole thing… I guess I wanted to mention the institutionalization of the church as well. I find that the church tends to be one of the last things to jump onto societal bandwagons, I guess because they are so strong to hold traditions, but in a sense, I guess you can consider the church as some sort of measure of society then. The church itself has become an institution now. We have titles, designations and requirements for the church now. I’m not saying that the church is wrong for this, to want pastors who have their masters of divinity, of course you’ll find better picks out of the litter when made exclusive, but really, I’m tired of living for these titles and reputations. Yes, it’s probably nearly impossible to find many churches that have committees that leave everything “open for God”. We need to have a say, we need to use our logic, our discernment and our judgment. But since when have we been logical, been good at discerning, or been righteous with our judgments. Yes… it’s important, and I guess it was inevitable, or else we’d keep hearing about homosexual pedophiliac pastors and priests. Sigh. Well now I really don’t know where I’m going with this. Downfall of society, veil of distortion put over our eyes and the reluctance to think twice about all that we’re living for… something like that I suppose.

        I think it’s somewhat futile to be talking about this anyways. I don’t believe that God has put me here to bring back the ‘old ways’. I think that in itself is futile. But I’m here now, so what can I do? That’s my question now I suppose. Something I learned over the weekend, I think over the radio, but, the term apostle means ‘to be sent’ in translation. I’m not 100% sure but I think I remember hearing that the translation of disciple means ‘to follow’… I suppose that makes sense. For anyone reading this seeking some spiritual food you guys can chew on (I’m surprised you’re actually reading my blog in the first place :p… but thanks) but the question is. When will you, or when have you made the transition from disciple to apostle. Yes, we are all called to be disciples. Jesus had thousands upon thousands of disciples, but don’t be confused, he only had twelve apostles. He only ‘sent out’ those twelve to change nations. Now, are you ready to make the transition?

10:40 AM | |

Sunday, January 01, 2006 

Fresh Start


        Well, it’s now officially a new year. Once again a new set of 365 days. A new set of time. Time for change, for growth and for broken promises.

        Each year, gyms across the country hit an all time high of memberships during the start of the year. By about march they hit a scarcity of attending members. Why? Broken promises. Yes, with the new year comes practically new anything. New resolutions? New goals? New ______? Fill in the blank with what you’re hooked up on this time of year. Something I ask myself is why people over and over keep applying for these year long gym memberships, only to go for the first three months and get lazy for the remaining 9 months of membership. And it’s not like they realize their mistakes after one year, year and year again you’ll find the same people applying for the same year-long gym memberships and stopping after three months.

        Pondering this paradox I came to one final answer. Why? Because maybe this time is different. Maybe… maybe not. Although most of the time we fall under the category of “maybe not”, at least we gave it a try. There’s a saying that goes, “for good men to go bad, they need only do nothing at all.” Picking up the attitude of “there’s no point in trying because I know I won’t accomplish my goal” is worse than trying and failing over and over. Although you may think you’re being logical by “saving time” or “saving money”, you’ll end up missing out on a simple lesson: Perseverance. 3Not only so, but we[a] also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. 5And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us. Romans 5:3-5 (NIV)

        So why perseverance? Why should we keep trying to run faster than Donovan Bailey, or swim faster than Ian Thorpe. Why should we keep trying to jump over the hurdle we trip over every time, why do we even try opening a locked door without a key. Why should we fight against 135,000 when we only have 300, why should we blow our trumpets at a brick wall. Why? Because the lord leads us under his perfect and pleasing will. Maybe it seems futile that we should keep trying at something we never seem to be able to get right, but if we don’t try at all, we have no chance at all. Something will never happen without attempting.

        It doesn’t matter how unlikely something may seem to you. Even if you see a small 0.001% chance, guess what God sees. God sees a choice. A choice between whether what happens is in His will or not. No slim chance is too small, nor certainty to great for Him to change what you think will happen. He who imagined the sun and gives source to its light, he who placed the stars in the sky and he who tells lightning bolts where to strike (ref, indescribable – Tomlin), yet you still doubt in his power to change who you are.

        This being said, why join the gym if you know you’re going to just be paying for nothing once you stop going a fourth of the way in. Why give God another chance if you think He’s been holding out on you all this time. Why? Because a “maybe” is definitely better than a “never”. Give it a chance, I guarantee, you’ll be much closer to success than you might think.

        Happy new years guys, I hope this is one where you can all grow and see things in a better light than you have before. This being said… I’ve picked up a lot of fat from holiday eating… maybe I should look into these gym memberships =). God bless.

6:31 PM | |